no control

Sometimes things happen in life that you simply have no control over. These things take place during an unknown time, in an unknown place, and to unknown people. They can change a person, forever.

I crouch down, low, so that not single hair can be seen above the couch. I tie me eyelids down onto my face. As I try to tighten each nerve, my body shakes, uncontrollably. Four million tiny hairs stand, acknowledging the chilly wind as it passes by. My fists clench, arms stiffen, back stuck in a twisted, hunched position, with my right shoulder shifted slightly higher than the left. My toes curl as my stomachs growls louder than a dog to its prey.

I cannot remember how long I’ve been crouched here. Several beads of perspiration collect on my brow, and a few drip down my spine. The blackness of the undersides of my eyelids begins to brighten. Suddenly, a hand seizes my bicep. My body tenses, but stays crouched. A deep, muffled voice curses at me. The grip tightens. I don’t budge. My eyes plead for me to open them, but I refuse. A burning arises in my eyebrows from the pressure. I press deeper into the back of the couch, wishing I could be sucked into it and disappear. “Please, let go. I haven’t done anything to you”. My face feels as though it has been set on fire. Why did I say that? Where did I get the courage to say anything? The fleshy vise doesn’t loosen, at all. My arm goes numb as my bicep begins to pulsate.

The pulsing dominates my body. My legs grow weak, and suddenly give out under my weight and I come crashing to the ground. With my eyes still crushed to my face, my body is suddenly jerked across the carpet. My knees roast as each layer of skin is set ablaze as it is yanked over the cottony kindle. The skin on the top of my toes begin to wear away. My body does not struggle. My legs do not kick. My vocal cords do not vibrate a single note. Every nerve, every muscle, every bone remains locked in place. I simply allow myself to be lugged over the carpeting.

With out warning, two ear piercing {bang!!}’s explode before me. The voice that was connected to the hand abruptly quits grunting and cursing. The sweaty clench releases. Everything is silent, except for a high pitched ringing bouncing around n my head. My body slams to the ground as the hand releases me. I scream as my left shoulder snaps out and back into place; a loud crackle protruding from the bone. Minutes craw by. No noise, no hustle, no movement. My shoulder throbs as each second creeps on. My exhausted limbs and abdomen become heavy, and my eyes roll back into my head. The world shuts off.

A smooth, warm hand whisks over my face, runs long, gentle fingers through my sopping hair and rests itself peacefully on my occipital bone. I ease open my eyes. My vision is blurry and for a moment all I see are masses of tiny, sparkling specks against a white backdrop. My retinas focus and a green-jacketed man comes into view. His flashy smile is radiant and his face relaxed. A cool breeze sways over my skin as I lie there, wrapped tightly in a beige, fleece blanket. My head pounds as my mind tries and make sense of the past 10 minutes. The blood in my veins slowly eases its way back into circulation and moves through my torso, quickly spreading out through my limbs.

I look over at the green-jacketed man, my face blotchy white and covered in a puzzled look. His smile grows and he says to me, “You got lucky, you know. Your neighbors saw Johnson walk into your house and they called the police immediately. I came out as soon as I got the call.” “Who’s Johnson?” I questioned the man. “He is a convicted serial killer who we’ve been looking for over a decade. He is the man who almost had you as his next victim.” Tears swell up in my blood shot eyes. “Why me?” I wonder out loud. He leans in close, his cheek resting lightly on mine, his warmth absorbing into my body, and whispers, “This was not your fault sweetie. It was no one’s fault. Sometimes, things happen in life, things that you simply have no control over.” (755)